Making the world safe from turkeys
Christina, Scott, Amy, and I ended up at the Treasure Island Fun Center last night, lured by my foggy memories of indoor putt-putt. (It's been pretty rainy the last couple of days, and Scott and Christina have some irrational fear of bowling alleys.) Unfortunately, the putt-putt area has been closed for some time, so we ended up wasting a few bucks on their video arcade, which was a mix of vintage and modern games.
I am no better at the games of the '80s now than I was then, at least I don't think so – "Arkanoid" was a disaster (I'm more used to Breakout-style games with a mouse now, and it has a spinning knob), "Mr. Do" was just confusing, and "Donkey Kong" wasn't even working. Once you put your token in, Mario just appears as a random collection of pixels and Donkey Kong himself sneers at you from atop the half-constructed skyscraper. I think DK is finally getting his revenge after years of abuse at the hands of video game players.
All of this was prelude, however, to Scott's discovery of his true vocation: turkey hunter. I believe the game was called "Sammy Outdoors USA Turkey Hunter," but the important part is that it featured a bright orange, plastic shotgun with realistic pump action and a whole mess of turkeys against various realistic backdrops. With each round of the game, the "hunter" sneaks up on flocks of photorealistic turkeys and tries to blow away the tom or toms in each group. The player is rated on how many toms one can kill in how many shots. Of course, once the first shot is fired it's pretty difficult to hit anything because they all go flying off in a hurry, but Scott was pretty adept at getting his turkey with that first shot.
So, for about twenty minutes, it went like this:
(Turkeys wander about aimlessly. Scott takes aim.)
Gobble gobble BLAM! Flutter flutter flutter flutter.
This was occasionally followed by additional BLAM!s as Scott tried (mostly unsuccesfully) to score additional birds, but the speed with which they take off, combined with the penalties incurred if you hit the hens, makes this a difficult task.
Christina, of course, was unimpressed. Her comment was: "How many turkeys can you EAT?"
Scott replied that she didn't have any problem with the other games in which one fires a gun at people, so what was her problem here? Christina explained that at least people can fight back.
"Well... they might be zombie turkeys," he offered.
Apparently satisfied with Scott's logic, Christina left to play a few rounds of Tetris.
I am no better at the games of the '80s now than I was then, at least I don't think so – "Arkanoid" was a disaster (I'm more used to Breakout-style games with a mouse now, and it has a spinning knob), "Mr. Do" was just confusing, and "Donkey Kong" wasn't even working. Once you put your token in, Mario just appears as a random collection of pixels and Donkey Kong himself sneers at you from atop the half-constructed skyscraper. I think DK is finally getting his revenge after years of abuse at the hands of video game players.
All of this was prelude, however, to Scott's discovery of his true vocation: turkey hunter. I believe the game was called "Sammy Outdoors USA Turkey Hunter," but the important part is that it featured a bright orange, plastic shotgun with realistic pump action and a whole mess of turkeys against various realistic backdrops. With each round of the game, the "hunter" sneaks up on flocks of photorealistic turkeys and tries to blow away the tom or toms in each group. The player is rated on how many toms one can kill in how many shots. Of course, once the first shot is fired it's pretty difficult to hit anything because they all go flying off in a hurry, but Scott was pretty adept at getting his turkey with that first shot.
So, for about twenty minutes, it went like this:
(Turkeys wander about aimlessly. Scott takes aim.)
Gobble gobble BLAM! Flutter flutter flutter flutter.
This was occasionally followed by additional BLAM!s as Scott tried (mostly unsuccesfully) to score additional birds, but the speed with which they take off, combined with the penalties incurred if you hit the hens, makes this a difficult task.
Christina, of course, was unimpressed. Her comment was: "How many turkeys can you EAT?"
Scott replied that she didn't have any problem with the other games in which one fires a gun at people, so what was her problem here? Christina explained that at least people can fight back.
"Well... they might be zombie turkeys," he offered.
Apparently satisfied with Scott's logic, Christina left to play a few rounds of Tetris.
